An Early Mother’s Day Gift
This is a bit early, but I have noticed too often that we take for granted the amazing women who have been heroes in our lives. Don’t worry dads. I have a blog post circulating in my mind already for June. I will definitely pay homage to the men in our lives and the strength they provide as well.
As I gave each one of my daughter’s a hug good night on Sunday, I had this epiphany that my little girls are really not little anymore. It was a bit of a jab to my heart because I remember when they were little, and I couldn’t wait for the time when they would be independent and I would not have to be doting on them every second of the day. As Hannah bent down to give me a hug, yes, it’s true, my 12 year old is almost surpassing me in my height, and Rebecca spans the length of the couch when she falls asleep during a movie, I realized that being a mom, being a role model to others, doesn’t stop as our children grow up.
My one daughter is in the world of Greek Mythology right now. As she devours the Percy Jackson series and listens intently to her Ancient World History teacher, thank you Mrs. Burgess for making this class amazing, I hear nightly about all of the different gods and goddesses, Roman Mythology, Greek Mythology, and Ancient Places in the world.
Hannah jokingly told me she changed my title to Athena on her contact list.
I said “What does Athena mean?” She is the Goddess of Wisdom and I think you can handle pretty much any situation at home.”
I was feeling so proud and my heart warmed.
Then, she added on, “Or you could be called Aries, just depends on the time of day.”
I asked “What does Aries mean?”
“He is the God of War, Athena’s enemy.”
Well, there you have it. It’s true, on any given day, us moms can be the all knowing, Goddess of Wisdom, or a twist of fate, and turn into the God of War.
Motherhood- we each do the best we can. I used to be one of those woman, a bit judgmental before I had children. I would scoff at the children who had meltdowns in the grocery store, or the parents who tiptoed out of their children’s bedrooms after they put their kids to bed. And then, I embarked on motherhood. All the advice I gave, the books I read, the looks I made BC (before children), went flying out the window.
As we are presented with various moments in a day, I truly think that moms have super powers.
We can handle Stressful moments,
Moments of strength,
Moments of Defeat,
Moments of Joy,
And the list goes on.
Just last Wednesday afternoon, I was trying to handle many mom things at once.
* Rebecca was busily researching her mission report, trying to find out the Santa Barbara Mission architecture.
* Hannah was getting ready for her first in person orientation for middle school, then realized she had nothing washed from her laundry.
* The dog started limping and the girls were worried if Kiara had dysplasia.
* Rebecca lost her Yogurtland gift card, frantically searched her entire room,
then 30 minutes later found a $5 dollar bill that was the same amount as the gift card.
* The timer went off for me to log back onto zoom to teach.
* And while the girls reluctantly went outside to water my garden (I asked them 4 times that day) the girls discovered that our gooseberries had ripened.
There was excitement in the air as they brought in a handful of these edible treasures.
So, Stressful moment? Yes
Moment of Defeat? Yes
Encouraging moment? Yes
Moment of Joy? Yes
Embarrassing moment? Not yet, but for sure it happened later in the day.
What I find that I rely on when my nucleus is spinning out of control, is to remember my collective strength of women that have been put in my path. I wonder how my grandmothers did this motherhood gig with 4 plus children, no Instacart, no take out delivery, and no support system except for letter writing with their closest friends.
However, they did it. It might not have been perfect, my mom and dad might be a bit wounded by some of their parents' decisions, but they were trying the best that they could.
Just like we are trying on a daily basis, to make the best choices for our children to thrive.
The patience we must present to children can be difficult to say the least. I remember my mom telling me when the girls were babies, that these were the easy days. I thought she was crazy when she told me that, after weeks of sleepless nights and crying babies.
However, I was able to promise them the world by just a gesture of going to the park or getting a scoop of ice cream.
As our children mature, the emotional demands that they are asking from their parents is often times more exhausting than the sleepless nights we had when they were infants.
Is this a bit depressing? I hope not!
Mothers of the World you are Goddesses of Wisdom. I stand proud with the title that my daughter gave me. Yes, I am Athena, I can handle many situations in my household.
And I also am humbled that my daughter thinks I could be the God of War. It is a subtle reminder that our children look up to us daily. Our actions, our words, our choices are being scrutinized by the ones we value the most in our home.
You might be thinking, well I am not a mom and this does not relate to me. If you know a child, you work with children, you are a nina to children, you are providing guidance to them. You are a mom at heart.
This job is a 24 hour gig, it comes without insurance, no overtime pay, minimal breaks,
But at the end of the day, the BENEFITS surpass any other job in the world.
Thank you to my Great Grandma “Mama”, to my Grandma Grycel, to my Nana, to my mom, to my aunts, to my friends’ moms who are like Aunties to me, and to the brave mothers in the world, that I have not met, but I have heard and read your stories.
We stand together in a collective spirit. We salute you this Mother’s Day and thank you for the love you provide to others.